Are there many stories, or is there one story?
There is one story. And it is the story of transformation. It is always that story. A challenge is presented. It seems insurmountable. Our ego hates it and wrestles against it. There is NO WAY we can solve this issue/crisis and we rigidly stare at the wall. Circumstances worsen and we HAVE to act in some way. Some tiny right action breaks up the egoic vise. Light gets in. At a glacial pace we allow the light while still holding onto our ego/view as if our life depended on it. The cracks increase and light slowly dissolves the ego stuckness and we feel transformed into new thinking.
Looking back we can’t even believe we thought THAT was a challenge.
Moms—walk yourselves back to having that first baby. I had a terror-filled moment at about 8 months along with Mads where I actually contemplated if there were other ways out of the situation than the natural one. Embarrassing to admit now, but so true. And my labor with her was interminable...I think it was 36 hrs! Lily? 6 hrs!
WE LEARN EXPERIENTIALLY, and when we grasp that this applies to life’s biggest lessons, lessons become easier to learn.
Some of my stories:
Student (I picked this one up in 3rd grade—stuck with me for decades): I’m not smart enough to play on the same field as everyone else. I need to hide my lack of intelligence/skills so no one figures out how incapable I am.
Partnership: I’m too nice of a person for a husband/partner to mistreat. I’m amazing and I deserve to be loved and supported. My partner should listen to me and get his shit together.
Partnership: I am a horrible person and deserve the shitty treatment I’m enduring; it is reflective of me not deserving wholehearted love.
Teen parenting: I’m a wonderful loving mother providing everything a child could need or want. My children shouldn’t get into trouble or reject my guidance. My children shouldn’t embarrass me.
Business failure: I am a diligent hard-working entrepreneur and have all the answers to my company’s challenges. My solutions should fix the problems. I deserve for this to work.
We are taught to listen to the whispers of the Universe, but who cares about those whispers when you are underwater and underneath an anvil of your own emotions?
If you are in pain, your pain is real and it is horrible and it is big and it is important. How can it be an illusion? All these noisy messages about being positive and being bigger and amazing—they look good on Instagram, but your pain is REAL and your story is different.
And when the pain hits, you’re not expansive, creative and wavelike…you’re dense, stupid, drained, and wrong.
If I picked up MY stories and gave them to you today, you would handle many of them with ease. Because they are not yours. You did not inherit the cellular trauma that informs the stories that I carry—my thinking that I’m a fraud, not smart enough, a failure as a parent or partner. Your stories are different. A book I am reading right now describes consciousness as a football field and our soul as the player. Consciousness is aware of all possible actions and outcomes on the field, but as the player, we can only see a little bit of the field. Whoa! I love that. So how do we get out of that player mentality and connect more with consciousness?
You already know. It’s meditation. You’re just resisting it, as we all do, because your mind and ego are so endlessly fascinating and they feel important. Plus emotions can’t be dissolved by meditation, or at least YOURS can’t.
Listen up, and then listen IN.
YES Your stories are deeply, deeply important. They are resonant and they matter.
I suffered enormously in many of the stories in the list above. However, had I not vanquished their heavy energy I would not today be able to see my temporary illusions…my (then) view of the field.
YOU HAVE TO WORK THROUGH YOUR STORIES. And when you do, you uncover the light of Consciousness—the football field of possibility. It takes tools to get free of emotional awful, but the alternative is to stay in tiny lives or tiny parts of our lives. As Marianne Williamson said, “Your playing small does not serve the world.” Do the work.
MEDITATION:Are you meditating daily? Recent studies show that just 9 minutes a day creates lasting change in your brain. Personally I need 20 to get to the sweet spot. Start with 5! If you haven’t already, join my free group on Insight Timer where I offer guidance in setting up and maintaining a practice and review meditation teachers/series.
JOURNAL: A tough practice to start, this one loves you back the more you give to it. I’ve got a handout on starter practices—message me if you want it.
ACUPUNCTURE: My favorite way to break up tough energy holds. Find a practitioner you trust and truly surrender to the experience. In times of crisis, I prescribe 1x/weekly. Personally I go twice a month.
EFT: Personalized acupressure to dissolve tough blocks. It really works! It’s been around for a while and it’s getting new press with its inclusion in Gabrielle Bernstein’s newest book, Judgment Detox. Margaret Lynch and Gabrielle Bernstein both have starter videos online/YouTube.
SWEAT: I have dragged myself into yoga furious, depleted, distressed, ruined, anxious, tearful, ashamed and hungover. Even if I hate 89 of the 90 minutes I never regret it. Break a sweat.
SLEEP + EAT: Resting and recharging your energy system. Every challenge is easier to tackle after a good night’s rest.
LAUGH: Do you have a humor posse? If not, create one! Laughter heals, it’s been proven in scientific studies. Plus it’s impossible to stay mad if you are laughing.
There are many stories in one story. Release the story.
DO YOU WANT TO DEEPEN YOUR PRACTICE?
The world needs lightworkers, and so do our families and tribes. Learn the tools to transform in my group mentoring class.
Is it coach training? Absolutely...but it's so much more. You learn not just to sit with clients and wait for the solution to arise, you learn how to creatively kick ass--your own, and those of the people around you. The world needs us to give up our BULLSHIT and live full out. To shed those stories, to learn the ninja skills that can help us release the weights and traumas that we don't need. To step into the light of being true lightworkers.
This comprehensive, practical course Includes training in key coaching tools including the essential practices of holding space, working with resistance, and finding your teachers. You'll practice personal coaching and mentoring, learn cutting-edge customer service skills, explore your own creativity, develop pleasurable marketing and sales essentials, and train in the latest most quantum mindset techniques.
A sample of what we work on....
- Holding Space
- Change Process
- Body Wisdom + Healing Stored Trauma
- Finding your teachers + their key lessons
- Doing your own work--blind spots + resistance
- Transformative Change: Meditation + Oneness
- Sacred Creativity: Your Secret Sauce
- Customer Service + Being of Service
- The gold in your stories
- What is ‘Mastery’
If this is whispering to you, let's talk! I've got a few spots open, and we start soon.
Everyone LOVES this course.